Hair Would Only Slow Me Down bald funny T-shirt Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Made-to-Order Graphic Apparel – Bold & Comfortable
Warning: once you feel this fabric, your other tees are getting benched. Gildan® Ultra Cotton meets studio-quality DTG printing. Comfort and color that actually last.
📸 The mockup shows a T-Shirt, but this design is available on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Just pick your style, color, and size – we’ll produce it exactly the way you want.
Why You’ll Love It
- 🎨 No Cheap Print Here – We don’t do vinyl or heat press. Pure DTG – ink in the fabric, color that lasts.
- 🧵 Comfort-Level: 10/10 – Gildan® blanks with OEKO-TEX certified dyes. Soft on skin, gentle on the planet.
- 👕 All-Day Comfort – Classic fit with taped seams and a tear-away label. Zero itch, zero irritation.
- 🇺🇸 From American Farms – US Cotton Trust Protocol certified. The good stuff, sourced the right way.
What It’s Made Of
- Cotton Tees & Long Sleeves: 100% US cotton at 5.3–6 oz – naturally soft and breathable.
- Fleece (Sweatshirt & Hoodie): 8 oz cotton/poly blend – warm, smooth surface, anti-pill finish.
- Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.
Color & Size Guide
Use the charts below to pick your ideal color and size:
Available Colors
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71 cm) | 36 in (92 cm) | 33.5 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29 in (74 cm) | 40 in (102 cm) | 35 in (89 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76 cm) | 44 in (112 cm) | 36.5 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (79 cm) | 48 in (122 cm) | 38 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81 cm) | 52 in (132 cm) | 39.5 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (84 cm) | 56 in (142 cm) | 39.5 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86 cm) | 60 in (152 cm) | 39 in (99 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
- Use the color chart to explore your options.
- Check the size chart for measurements.
- Select, add to cart, and enjoy!
When Will It Arrive?
- ✅ Made in: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 US Shipping: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ Rush Delivery: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 Worldwide: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
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